ruby's crap.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

finally, FREEDOM. i think it hasnt really hit me yet because i had absolutely nothign to do today but i felt like i had exams to worry about. haha. the only thing i have to worry about exams now are the results.. but i think i did alright.

i want to shop... more. hahahaha. but cash, as always, is a problem. i feel bad spending my ang pao money. lol. coz i already have enough tops. no? lol.

i thought i found the perfect pair of jeans yesterday.. it was perfect except for one flaw. pockets. i shall not delve into it too much coz otherwise i will get upset. :(.

in other news.. my mother says i am fat and that i need to lose weight. i told her fadzly and i, okay, just "i", am going to the gym when holiday starts! :D. i cant wait to tone up my arms. hehe.

okay i thot i would have alot to talk about once exams finish and stuff.. i can plan for holidays. but no not really.. cant really think of what to post. oh! okay maybe i shall update you guys about Summer Touch League!

if you even care. haha so anyway, my team and i won the first game with like 8 freaking players in total at the end. we started with 9 but poor ha ha tore her ankle ligament. no joke, fucking crazy. anyway she is now out for 3 or 4 games. which sucks coz she's fast but we will definitely make do :). we played against Jurong JC and beat them 8 - 1. =). this saturday we're playing bucks margaritas! will update you then =)

Sunday, February 11, 2007

painful disappointment.
that just about sums up my feelings towards my performance at the games on saturday.. yes we took home the silver, but as you all know me, silver is not enough.

to me, silver is the shittiest award to get. and to my team members who read this (if you even do), please do not get angry or anything, this is simply my view of the medal and it is not meant to make YOU feel like your award is shit. i dont think any of you deserve to feel like your award is shit because you all didnt make the mistake that i did.. what more me being the captain?

to me, getting third means getting into the top 3, being first means taking it all. being second means you're good.. but not good enough. as the cliche goes; so close yet so fucking far away.

lesson learnt i supposed.. it was great to be given the chance to lead the team. dont know if i'll ever get such a chance again.. i guess now what i need is to get over playing a disappointing defense.. letting my teammates down.

she trusted, "ruby will take her."
but i didnt.

its mix feelings really.. on one hand, im happy because this means the juniors have really stepped up.. that now the whole team is strong..

on the other hand im upset because i made a mistake i know better not to make. a stupid mistake that cost my team the gold.

also on a personal level.. i couldve been the one holding the cup, been the one being interviewed by the newspaper.. the one who smiled home.

not the one who cried there and then,
not the one who cried on the bus home,
not the one who cried to sleep.

to end on a lighter note, the only thing good about crying at night is that the next day i have double eyelids. ha ha. see you all.

ps:/ good job at the games against jansenites my dear. =)

Friday, February 09, 2007

God the lack of rest and sleep is seriously affecting my brain.

I actually let two people break through me at training. i havent had anyone break through me for so long already!! my god.. not that im trying to make excuses but the tiredness could be one of the reasons.. also there wasnt enough communication.

the game's on saturday and the team played quite shitty today at training. found out that even after i left training, the team's performance did not pick up.

please please! let us have some focus!!

i will be sleeping damn early on friday night man..

alright, this is just a short update coz i am at chandini's house now doing project.. yes.. at 2:14am in the morning.

went to the airport to send raudha off. i dont want to talk about it coz it kinda hurts. =(. see you guys around..

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

So there I was,
listening to Explosions in the Sky.
Eyes closed,
wishing for your warmth against my back.

To be wrapped tight,
contrast the cold floor, cold air.
To feel your skin,
contrast the rough tiles.

Just the two of Us,
listening to Explosions in the Sky.
Eyes closed.

And I wouldnt wish for anything more.

<3

Monday, February 05, 2007

i am fucking annoyed with my sports media marketing.

how the fuck can we. ARGH, im TOO frustrated to even type the post. that's saying something. I will update when calmer. good night.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

I am bloody annoyed with myself.

Cause i make it through the day without eating "junk food" then stuff myself at NIGHT.

and shut the fuck up with the "you're not fat, ruby" coz i just want a flat stomach okay?

only 5 freakin kgs and its so damn hard!! its gym time.

what also sucks is the impending group projects due. coz that eats into gym time. i want muscles!! im happy with my legs, training pretty much tones them up for me. its my arms that i would like to work on. i dont even want washboard abs. i just want a freakin flat stomach.

guys PLEASE help me!! it's only 5kgs to hit 50kg! im not even aiming for preposterous weights like 45kg (although 48 would be PERFECT). 50kg first. even 52 i will be happy.

PLEASE HELP ME!!

tips on how to suppress cravings would be good. as well as how to restrain myself from succumbing to temptation. THANK YOU!

on a last note, just thought i'd put this up here. he's probably going to kick my ass for this but whatever! haha.

dear fadzly amir/blacksheepboy/kuching/pantat,
thank you for being so sweet and wonderful.

i'd do nothing and anything,
go nowhere and anywhere,
just as long as you're by my side.

I love you! :)
_____________________________________

to my dear sweet readers, you're all probably not used to this side of me. im sorry if i made you feel uncomfortable for a split second. get used to it! i think there might be more to come. haha!

good night y'all.

Hey guys, if animals matter to you, why dont you click on this link and petition to help achieve recognition and protection of animals around the world?

It's a simple form to fill out, doesnt take much time. so do your part!

Click here.

And spread the word! Put the link up on your blog and friendster page. =)

Friday, February 02, 2007

i wonder how people who do last minute work can have the cheek to ask people like me (who dont do last minute work) to discuss group projects. like what, oh suddenly you got initiative ah?

im sorry but i don't like that. i feel insulted.