Tuesday, January 31, 2006

ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

i really cant remember what i wanted to say. hahaha. anyways, Ad's place for visiting today. it was fun trying to learn how to play mahjong for about 10 minutes before i had to leave. haha.

i visited my grandma before going to Ads. and i got sad there. she's alone, and sick and she's got a bad foot. i just feel so awful. the rest of the family went to somewhere else for visiting. even the maid is not there. i mean, couldnt you just leave the maid at home? i know the maid, i talk to her, and i know she hates the kids. haha not like she wants to kill them, but like, i know she'd very much rather stay home with my grandma. i just felt sad lah, seeing her like alone in the house, so poor thing.. dont ask me why im not doing anything coz.. coz some reason, i cant.

another thing's been bothering me as well. cant really expose it here. coz this is a public blog. hahaha.

Monday, January 30, 2006

um, i have 10 ang paos in total at the moment, havent open yet.

anyhows, chinese new year doesnt seem like chinese new year. and felix agrees with me. its the polytechnic system me thinks.

nothing much to say really. OH OH! I WANT A PAIR OF BIRKENSTOCKS. raudha has shown me their loveliness. and i got to wear a pair at my uncle's place. they're comfy. yay. but i dont need it. so um, yea.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

time with raudha love today. talked SO much, ahh but that's expected. hahahaha.. only we can take each others shit.

CAN YOU IMAGINE WE ACTUALLY STARTED A SMALL ARGUMENT ON WHICH RACE IS WORSE?

WTF RIGHT! as in, me taking the side of chinese and raudha taking the side of malay. LMAO. fucking funny.

bought a pair of red shoes, and my summerbykenzo! FINALLY. and the price has also gone down by alot lah. which is good. haha.. awesome.

ran into hannan and his friends at far east where he met THE FAMOUS raudha. (his words!) hahaha..

Nothing much to say.. HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!

edit:
took this quiz i found on girlissues. you have to draw a house and do a short quiz and then they analyze your personality for you. here's the summary:

Based on your drawing and the 10 answers you gave this is a summary of your personality:
You are sensitive and indecisive at times. You are a freedom lover and a strong person. You are shy and reserved. If you've drawn a cross on each of windows, you always want to live alone. You are very tidy person. There's nothing wrong with that because you're pretty popular among friends. Your life is always full of changes.

You will avoid being alone and seek the company of others whenever possible. You love excitement and create it wherever you go. You see the world as it is, not as you believe it should be.

You added a flower into your drawing. The flower signifies that you long for love. It also safe to say that others don't see you as a flirt. You don't think much about yourself.

hmm.. i would say its 98% true. because, i wont avoid being alone. im fine with being alone at times. AND HOW IN THE WORLD CAN I BE SHY AND RESERVED?! i did draw crosses on the windows, just fyi. tidy person.. um.. i can be. other than that.. everything else is dead true at the moment.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

I FUCKING LOVE YOU RAUDHA.

im sad. i found out that i will be promoted to year 2, but in my year 2 sem 2.1, i will be taking my sem 1.1 subjects. because i have not taken them due to my transfer. that SUCKS. i cant believe im thinking of this aspect but.. well, my social circle will be, erm.. kind of.. i dont know. there'll just be alot of changes and you KNOW how bad i am with dealing with changes. i never thought i'd be bothered about my social life but.. i guess i am. the change in time table implies that there is a chance im graduating a sem later than everyone else.. MY RUGBY FRIENDS WILL BE GONE!!!!! ='( boohoo.. i mean, theres only so much meeting outside can do.. haiz. im sad, really. yes, i half-expected it but.. i guess i wasnt that prepared.

on the bright side, im hoping graphics design will be a core subject coz that means im going to learn photoshop. YAY.

on the down side, its confirmed media & society is a core subject and i have not received ONE good comment about it from my classmates.

so much for ups and downs.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

thank you farij for hearing me out, for sharing things with me and for trying to cheer me up =)

thank you hannan for hearing me out and for trying to make me feel better and telling me to look on the brighter side of things. =)

thank you magg for always asking me if im feeling ok. =)

thank you fera for hearing me out, and for telling me i deserve better. it may or may not be true but it felt nice to hear that. =)

thank you, to faarisi, for making me happy for that period of time. you're still as awesome as you are. =)


thank you members because you guys are just AWESOME.
maaaauuper! hahahaha.. i love you all.

its sad when you find a guy who has all the qualities you want in him, only to have him not want what you are.

but.. i understand. id have to hurt a cheena guy who'd dig me, right?

Monday, January 23, 2006

im dressed in all black today, unintentionally. i only realised while i was walking across the road opposite my block. Black t shirt, capris, bag, slippers and well my blazer is black too.

maybe its my subconcious' doing to reflect how im feeling.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

jeeman is a dickhead and an idiot. period. full stop. oh my god, do all girls go through these angsty ex-boyfriend moments? but i dont have anything against navin. =x.

fuck, i got journalism and french todo! gah last minute work.

my mom said something funny again, today while at the market with her, we go tto the topic of nurliyana tonggek. hahaha.. first my mom ask if she's married, so i say of course not, then my mom said this with the most serious of faces:

"if she can get married she's lucky, her backside so big."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHHA WTF RIGHT! FUNNY SIA.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

honestly, im terribly afraid. as well as afraid to spill it out here. because the impression its going to give is not a good one.

NECK CRAMPS AND ACHING RIGHT LEG. omg.

yesterday, wicky kind of insulted me. i was answering these 2 girls' questions when all of a sudden he butts in and takes over. omg, hello, please, i AM a cmm student, i know i only joined in sem 1.2 but i still CAN answer those questions. even the teacher said i was good ok! (i was saying hello to all those people in a really friendly voice and telling them they can feel free to shoot me questions) and he said it 5 minutes in to me turning up. gah. i think i should be those. yea attract-people person because i feel i can make others feel at ease around me, especially when meeting for the first time. perhaps i can attribute my becok to that? hahaha.. the only flaw is, im SO discriminated. i obviously will only talk to them nicely if i WANT to. and by that you should know i mean, if they're not cheena. haha.

OMG AND I SAW AHMAD TODAY AT MY SCHOOL. HIS HAIR CHANGED AND HE IS SOOOOO CUTE NOW!!! OMG OMG OMG.

but as cute as he is, ishi is cuter. ahahhaha.

and can someone tell me how a BOY can take FORTY minutes to shower?!

Friday, January 20, 2006

my left calf is killing me and my neck is like.. crampish. all from contact! woohoo. it was fun. learnt a little about tackling. which was fun. except the first few times didnt really know how to fall properly so i hurt my neck. but other than that, it was definitely awesome. i realise that i may actually be able to score when i evade defenders because in contact they have to bring you down whereas in touch rugby, all they have to do is touch you. and you know, i am big and heavy so.. erm yea. aiya you all get it ah. ok good night.

you're sweet =).
i was named Queen of the Lame Kingdom.
You be King, ok?

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

sometimes i wonder if im prominent enough for people whom i want to notice me, notice me.

sometimes i wonder if my friends think of me when i think of them.

sometimes i wonder if the people i remember, remember me.

sometimes i wonder what it would be like, if i wasnt like what i am.

sometimes, shit happens.

sometimes, i want to do things but.. cannot make it.

sometimes, i laugh until my jaw hurts.

sometimes, i smile, but im sad.

sometimes, i feel like im the luckiest person on earth.

but sometimes, i just want to sleep forever.

Monday, January 16, 2006

this feeling sucks. im sitting in the lab, quieter than usual (as noticed [and appreciated? haha :/] by vicnan and hana)im sleepy, cold, and i dont know if its the air con or me; ie if im having a fever or not, a little hungry but afraid to eat because feeling nauseous in school is not comfortable. at home at least you can lie down on your sofa or whatever.. throwing up in school is not half as bad as FEELING like you want or need to throw up but the puke is not coming up. i think i should go have a cup of milo after this. but im not in formal attire! therefore i need to go to the lecture early so the teacher wont see me? :/

some things said are just diabetic. =)

Sunday, January 15, 2006

yesterday's game resulted in sunburn ON THE BACK OF MY KNEE! talk about weird place :S. anyhoos, the girls yesterday got a little fiesty. >=). dont mess with tpiranhas because we will take you down in the snap of a finger. TP Team B lost to SRJC due to a COMPLETELY (pause) SUCKY (pause) referee. seriously, even our coach said so. i hope SRJC doesnt think that they won truly because.. well they didnt. its not that im a sore loser, but the fact remains that tpiranhas is a better team and what way to destroy playing skills than being complacent? if SRJC truly believes they are better than us and start becoming complacent and cocky then good luck to them. grr.

but team A brought home a medal! 3rd place. :D. its a pretty medal save for a poorly printed logo of the naval base thingy at the back (or front?) and its pretty heavy too. here's a picture :D.

i felt that we didnt play too well in the first game, but picked up on the second. third game was a loss but in the end won by default. then later erm.. there's a win. defense was great but without ifa i think our attack was abit poor.

ALSO! great news! a verbal agreement was made before the last game (that would conclude the winner) that marli would teach us contact if we won. and we did! so YAY. hahaha.. training starts on thursday? dont know if it will be a serious thingy but would be fun to learn. =)

after that, had dinner and laughter then.. home time. omg, i went home, showered and just SLEPT. hahaha..

Friday, January 13, 2006

i just want to slam this particular asshole.

omg, how many fucking girlfriends have you had since you broke up with me?! you're like jumping from one girl to another. if not for the fact i didnt want to be mean towards you i'd probaly just post a bulletin warning everyone about you. stupid asshole. if you cant commit, dont go around making noises. i bet you said things like "i love you" and shit like "i will never leave you" or whatever the FUCK. STOP LYING TO THE POOR GIRLS YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! i hope you fucking rot in hell or get your heart ripped apart at the seams maybe then you will know how all those girls felt.

and then i will have some nice stuff to say about members. =)

to steph and lulu, thank you for putting up with my nonsense, i know many a times ive gotten on your nerves. thank you for not giving up on me. please do not think that because i smile, doesnt mean i dont feel shitty when i dont perform. i do, and i also do want to improve. i guess my game play just isnt consistent and i would really like to work to make it consistent.

to farij and faarisi, thank you for saying all those nice stuff about me =)

to magg, thank you for carrying my bag and pulling me away from the car =)

to jeremy, thank you for getting up twice to order food for me =)

to baldwin, thank you for initiating saying "members"!! you are the only one man! =D

to zam and ungku, thank you for being cute. hahaha. =D.

i didnt miss out anyone right?

ok and lastly, to hannan, thank you for being the incredibly nice bear you are. if something is bothering you, im really concerned and would like to hear you out, but if its too private, i'll leave you alone okay? =)

AND RAUDHA, OMG I SAW GLENN SANDU IN LIKE THIS RIDICULOUS GOTH OUTFIT. HE LOOKED LIKE A (pause) FUCKING (pause) JOKE. and my GOD he is SO SCRAWNY!!

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

damn this weather.. it's jeopardising my photography! =(

Sunday, January 08, 2006

my uncle told me a funny story about his ns day. last time the bunk that he slept in got alot of people snoring, so the rest who dont, put ear plugs in. then the next morning when the snoring ones woke up and asked them, "eh why you all put ear plugs?" my uncle replied:

"oh, last night got motorcycle racing."

HAHAHA!! wtf busted right! funny sia...

Saturday, January 07, 2006

just a short update. i broke another record. i woke up after 2pm today! haha. ok that's all.

Friday, January 06, 2006

my my have things twisted. now i am afraid. :s. really. if it pulls through, how am i going to reveal what happened? then again, ive thought about the possiblity of it being a stepping stone thing like the prvious one.

anyway, the record thingy erm, yea we broke it. hooray! omg i ran freaking 13 KM OK!!! that is the craziest distance ive ever EVER ran. i was also quite amazed by how i wasnt tired even after the 5th.. and the 8th round.. and the 10th.. hahaha.. and those are 400m rounds please! dont you bastards come and try be funny and say they're like small rounds or whatever. first run was 13 rounds, second (at freaking three.40 AM) was 15 rounds, then last one was for show, 5 rounds only. haha. do the math if you dont believe i ran 13km.

and once again its another of those tp titans and tpiranhas bonding-ish session and i got to get closer to some people like farij, magg, ungku, farisee (?, i dunno how to spell haha).. farij is sooooo sweet, when the girls were sleeping at night, he went around covering their legs with jackets or t shirts. :) awwwwwww... hahaha..

im part of MEMBERS. hahahahahaa..

anyway the whole experience was just really fun and funny (as are all of my memorable ones) and at the end of the day i just didnt want things to end. but of course, all things come to an end. aaaaaaaand.. i have to come home, then SLEEP. and get started on my assignments. im worried about photography. coz that is the most time consuming one. and bloody hell i only just found out can use digicam. grr. i thot there was something to do with finding out the aperture and shutter speed. bahh.. anyway im afraid if the picture blow up then not so nice. so better not try. my megapixel 4.2 only.

ta, hopefully i am able to actually get up from my bed tomorrow since my lower half's response level is decreasing. haha. see y'all soon =)

Monday, January 02, 2006

i think its either that the guy im interested in is simply not interested, or he is trying to make me jealous.

either way, i'll be alright with it.

SO! 2006. its the start of the new year (chyea like everybody else doesnt know that ruby) and um.. i just hope for greater things to come.

i hope to mature more and develop myself more in terms of skills (rugby, life, studying). and hope for more happy events to come my way.

ps:/ is it a bad thing to have a blatant attitude towards mistakes? coz everytime i make a mistake, i dont feel too bad, which can be a bad thing because i just brush it off as a lesson i have to learn. yes i know its suppose to be that way, but using that as an excuse would be bad, right?